For the love of pie

Published on Sunday, 23 October 2011 13:49

Written by Randy Garbin

I present you, dear readers, with this image of an apple pie we just purchased from the Mastoris Diner in Bordentown, New Jersey. For those who don't know about the Mastoris, I can best describe it as probably the penultimate of all the big Greek-style, Jersey-built diners. At more than 600 seats, it surpasses most — if not all — of them in size, history, and food quality.

I wanted to pay special tribute to the pie today, because it simply sets the standard that too many of the big Jersey diners do not follow. Normally, when I go to any large diner in the Garden State, I steer clear of the pies and the cakes. For the most part (actually, almost without exception) an apple pie in a big Jersey diner has a gelatinous consistency (I call it gloopy) and a crust devoid of flavor and texture. The cakes are typically heavy, dry affairs that suffer from their far-too-lengthy storage in dry, refrigerated environs. Most of the time, if I order any dessert at all, I'll go for the bread pudding. I guess Sysco doesn't offer this. 

Pies, on the other hand, seem to sit in the case mostly for show. To paraphrase an early 1970s Monty Python sketch about Austrailian wines, pies in big Jersey diners are not for eating. They are for lying down and avoiding. The whole "baking on premises" becomes meaningless thanks to the common practice of pouring a can of filling into a frozen, stamped-out crust and baking it in the diner's oven. 

The Mastoris family never got the memo. Mention their diner to anyone with even a passing familiarity, and it sparks a conversation about the cheese bread that every customer gets as a complimentary appetizer. Finish just that, and you're ready to go home. But I don't think the Mastoris gets enough credit for its other desserts. Maybe that's simply because I'm not really a local.

As we exited the Mastoris after our dinner last Friday night, I spied the "mile-high" apple pie in the case behind the counter. I noted its crust that didn't looked stamped out by a machine. The whole appearance of it had a tantalizing imperfection found only in hand-made desserts. Could the filling possibly live up to the promise made by that towering, golden crust?

Oh... My... God... Yes, it did. I know that desserts are a hotly debated topic among foodies, but for me this pie hit the mark on every front. The crust, which was somehow flaky, rich, and flavorful, encased a perfect balance of crisp apple slices bathed in a mostly-sweet, slightly tart cinnamon seasoned filling. No a la mode for me, thanks. When you experience this level of pie nirvana, ice cream is only a distraction.  

If I have any complaint at all about the Mastoris apple pie, it's that there isn't enough crust. I'll grant that these high-profile desserts catch your eye and call out to you as you try to walk past them, but I would adjust the crust to filling ratio a bit more in favor of the former. Either way, I doubt the change or lack thereof will have much impact on a diner that on most days looks like O'Hare at Thanksgiving.

You cannot miss the 600-seat Mastoris Diner. It sits at the crossroads of Routes 130 and 206 in Bordentown, New Jersey. Tell them Roadside sent you.