For those of you who don’t live in Massachusetts, that means “Massachusetts driver.” Maybe it’s because I’ve been behind the wheel in a few other states this past year—California, Maine, Upstate NY—but it truly is different here. And it is freaking annoying!
Drivers in this state are so bad, so rude, and so aggressive, and I have been living here so long, that it’s almost wiser not to get upset. To just lower the bar, just grin and bear it, just take the high road.
But a column the other day in my very fine local newspaper, the Gloucester Daily Times, inspires me to put my fuming into words. The column was by local wag (“wag”!—you have to love this word! so much more fun than “smart ass”) Gordon Baird, and it was entitled “A little frontier justice in the Fishtown Driving Derby.” His rant was about a local practice of hogging not only your side of the road but aggressively forging ahead using the middle or even a goodly part of the oncoming lane when driving on narrow streets. Our streets here in Gloucester aren’t excessively narrow—though my bicycling sons lament the lack of adequate bike lanes—but they are often made so by parked cars. Navigating a road like that, with a few curves, takes skill. And if you are one of the drivers that annoyed Gordon, it takes an aggressive attitude. “They never think about the car who has to drive into the gutter to avoid them...they demand the five feet of extra room on their side.”
Oh, Gordon, honey, this is not the half of it.